VS
Author Victoria Sawyer


Bring Me To Life
New novel coming soon!
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Sexy Canning = Botulism
Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…
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Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead
I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…
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My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland
So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half. Prior to this med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years. And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…
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Broken, The Internet Is
So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…
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A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling
Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies. It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead. I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that. What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically. Yes, yesterday I was…
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My Endometriosis Story
Having a chronic illness is cool. Having several is even better. It’s especially fun when you think one of them might be gone and then it REARS its ugly head yet again and brings you right back to square one, living Groundhog Day all over again. So let’s talk about my Endometriosis story, which I…
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The Last Option
In honor of Mental Illness Awareness Week…I offer you a short story about suffering from mental illness. Will you take the time to spread the word, to spread acceptance, empathy and compassion? Everyone knows someone who suffers, even if you don’t realize it, for many suffer alone. Are you willing to make it a bit…
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Getting My Muse Stinkin’ Drunk
This might well be my most ill-advised, irresponsible blog post yet. However, it’s not like someone else advised me not to write this. I advised myself that it was wrong, then battled it out in my head and….yeah I won. So here goes nothing!! (afterall, I’ve never let inhibitions get in my way before! Just…
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Writers: Stop Writing and Live
Sometimes writing isn’t writing, sometimes to write you need to stop writing. This just occurred to me as I sat here listening to music and emotion suddenly infected me with a sense of joy, love, clarity. What I realized is that writers need breaks. Sometimes we have to live or our stories will not be…
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Queen For a Day. Or Two. Screw that, Queen Foreva!!
So you’ve heard my woes, here and here, about my meds causing me to suffer the agony of a life without creativity and without…gasp…sleep. Yes, it was hell. I know, the kinds of problems I have…pathetic. You also heard my woes damning anxiety absolutely to hell and back again because it was driving me up…
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DAMN YOU ANXIETY!!
I’m going to apply for a job. Last night I lay awake in bed for hours going over every aspect of the job description that makes me nervous and with every anxious thought, I thought DAMN YOU ANXIETY!! And of course with every thought, I imagined how I can’t handle it, how I’ll crumble, how…
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Adult Temper Tantrums Are Allowed.
I’m throwing the worst temper tantrum ever. Now before you start imagining me kicking and screaming, I need to clue you in on what that means. Worst refers to the fact that this is probably the most pathetic temper tantrum ever recorded because I’m far too lazy to engage in true hysterics. I almost feel…
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This Season of USA is Lit!
These writers on this season of the USA are doing a bang up job keeping us on the edge of our seats! Let’s just hope they’re not like the writers for LOST! Buckle up for some existential rambling DREAD below! (Don’t worry, it’s…
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The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill
Remember that place the so-called Landfill? I know you’re like…”What? No? What place? I don’t recall anything like that.” (All said while avoiding eye contact). Well, I’m here to point your attention in the direction of your local landfill, filled not with LAND…
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This is Why We’re All Overweight
I’ve done a little thinking on the topic and I’ve come up with several reason why we’re all overweight and continue to gain the old lbs. The equation looks something like this: unhappiness + depression + meaninglessness + boredom + our modern culture…
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A Strictly “Adult” Birthday
I recently celebrated a birthday which I kept strictly adult. And by strictly adult, I’m referring to the fact that there’s no way I received toys intended for children for my 33rd birthday celebration. But before we debate my adult-hood status, let’s start out with how Mr. VS received a bonus at work a few weeks before…
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Resting Bitch Face Syndrome
People across the world finally have a name for a disorder they’ve been suffering from for years: Resting Bitch Face Syndrome (RBFS). RBFS sufferers no longer have to suffer in silence! Now that their disorder is finally being taken seriously by society, there is hope for a cure or at the very least understanding and…
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I Got No Time for Egos
You know what drives me nuts? Big Double-Whopper Egos. They annoy me and give me indigestion and high blood pressure. Ain’t NOBODY got TIME for EGOS! They’re the reason that so much in society and the world goes shitty. Because people have too much wrapped up in their damn egos. It’s why people can’t admit they’re…
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Vampires be Chillin’ at My House
This week it’s LADIES NIGHT!! Be sure to visit the other FBF bloggers (their links are at the bottom of the post)! At my house, we’ve got a serious domestic vampire problem. It’s getting really bad because the cats are hanging out with them in the yard, chillaxin’ in the long grass, hanging out under…
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Your Viewing Pleasure – Drunk History
For your viewing pleasure, a bit of Drunk History, as told by some drunk motherfuckas and acted out by Hollywood’s best. Ummm..amazing!!




