VS
Author Victoria Sawyer
Bring Me To Life
New novel coming soon!
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Sexy Canning = Botulism
Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…
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Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead
I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…
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My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland
So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half. Prior to this med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years. And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…
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Broken, The Internet Is
So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…
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A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling
Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies. It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead. I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that. What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically. Yes, yesterday I was…
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My Waste Toner Cartridge Needs Replacement
When I say my waste toner cartridge needs to be replaced, what I really mean is that there is waste that needs eliminating. And what I mean by that is that my body seems to need to eliminate waste all the freaking time and I’m over it. Let’s just get over the ew factor here…
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An Awkward Encounter: BFF Edition
Have you ever had a really awkward encounter with someone you’re quite close to? Have you ever seen someone “out of context” and it made your brain feel all funny and mushy and you couldn’t speak like an edu-macated homo-sapien? An occurrence like this happened to me just the other day with my friend Annie…
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Black Friday Crusades
Hello All on this lovely Black Friday! I’m here to tell you why Black Friday is the WORST invention EVER!! I feel a little rant coming on. I think it’s pretty funny that we’ve got this holiday where we’re supposed to be loving each other, spending time with family, giving and being thankful and then…
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Bring Me To Life – New Fiction in the works!
After more than 13 years I’ve started writing again and I picked up a story I started back in 2010. It’s a gritty, dark, sexy modern fairytale – a Sleeping Beauty reboot inspired by sex, drugs & rock n’ roll! Back in 2010 I was inspired by Evanescence’s song of the same name as well…
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Your Exclamation Points are Hurting My Ears!
The other day my ears were acting cray-cray and suddenly everything seemed really really loud. (Damn cold!) Mr. VS was trying to have a normal conversation with me and I had to shush him like 5 times. He was screaming! And then I went to work and everyone there was yelling like a bunch of…
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7 Sneaky Ways to Destroy Writer’s Block
We’ve all been there, staring at the blank page, cursor maddeningly blinking away with absolutely nothing in our boring heads. It’s a terrifying feeling when there’s this black void in the space where genius is supposed to live. We begin to wonder, have we lost our golden touch? Have all our stunning ideas dried up and…
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Insta-Replay for Bloggers, Writers and Artists
I was watching the news this morning and they were doing a recap of high school football and they kept showing instant replays of all the amazing catches and long runs that the high school students were doing at their foose-ball games. There were even hometown heros and VIP’s and whatnot. I thought to myself…it must be pretty snazzy…
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Are Bloggers Self-Centered Nitwits?
I read an article the other day that seemed to be crassly implying (okay, outright stating) that Bloggers are self-centered nitwits. That we write about ourselves because we’re obsessed with ourselves and that people who are not self absorbed wouldn’t be sitting there writing about themselves all the time. I gotta call bullshit on this. Because…
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I Am Full of Bullshit: My Best Quotes on Angst
I’ve decided to collect together for your enjoyment and LOL’ing (still I shudder) an assortment of crazy, strange and yes, awesome quotes from my favorite Angst posts. I can and do amuse myself all the time (perhaps I’m the only one?). So…brace yourselves for genius (I’m so full of shit I can’t even let that…
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This Season of USA is Lit!
These writers on this season of the USA are doing a bang up job keeping us on the edge of our seats! Let’s just hope they’re not like the writers for LOST! Buckle up for some existential rambling DREAD below! (Don’t worry, it’s…
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The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill
Remember that place the so-called Landfill? I know you’re like…”What? No? What place? I don’t recall anything like that.” (All said while avoiding eye contact). Well, I’m here to point your attention in the direction of your local landfill, filled not with LAND…
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This is Why We’re All Overweight
I’ve done a little thinking on the topic and I’ve come up with several reason why we’re all overweight and continue to gain the old lbs. The equation looks something like this: unhappiness + depression + meaninglessness + boredom + our modern culture…
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Friday Obsession-Thoughts: Gifs and Funny Blogs
YEAH It’s the FRIZZ!! How happy are you? The Frizz is the best day of the work week. And when it hits end-o’-work o’clock then it’s the best day/time of the weekend too! All in all, a sweet day. This week I’m obsessed with 2 things. Gifs and Funny blogs. For example, here’s one blog…
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Tandem Sleeping
When I write Tandem Sleeping it makes me laugh. It reminds me of slalom or something or for some reason bob sledding. Why? Why? Anyway, I want to write about sleeping with someone else. It’s weird. In particular I’m going to tell you about sleeping with Mr. VS. Doesn’t that sound like fun and/or inappropriate? …
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A New Addiction Cometh: Coffee
I’ve recently added a new addiction to my collection: coffee. (I do collect addictions even though I make claim to NOT having an addictive personality. FYI, the things that I claim are always strongly suspect.) Regarding Coffee, I never thought this addiction would happen to me. I thought I was immune to Coffee’s charms. But…
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I Am Full of Bullshit: My Best Quotes on Angst
I’ve decided to collect together for your enjoyment and LOL’ing (still I shudder) an assortment of crazy, strange and yes, awesome quotes from my favorite Angst posts. I can and do amuse myself all the time (perhaps I’m the only one?). So…brace yourselves for genius (I’m so full of shit I can’t even let that…
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Optimizing SEO for Maximum Angst
In learning recently about SEO, I’ve realized that I do a terrible job of catering to my old friend Google. Or Bing or Chrome or Jeeves or Yahoo or whomever rules my online searchability status (they treat me like a peasant, when clearly I’m deserving of royalty status. I am QUEEN!). Honestly, I don’t like…
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Uncanned Laughter: Post O’ the Day
I’m responding to a Post O’ the Day! Here’s the prompt: “A misused word, a misremembered song lyric, a cream pie that just happened to be there: tell us about a time you (or someone else) said or did something unintentionally funny. ” When I went camping a year ago with friends, we had the…
Angst Anarchy 