VS
Author Victoria Sawyer
Bring Me To Life
New novel coming soon!
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Sexy Canning = Botulism
Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…
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Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead
I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…
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My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland
So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half. Prior to this med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years. And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…
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Broken, The Internet Is
So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…
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A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling
Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies. It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead. I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that. What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically. Yes, yesterday I was…
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Adult Temper Tantrums Are Allowed.
I’m throwing the worst temper tantrum ever. Now before you start imagining me kicking and screaming, I need to clue you in on what that means. Worst refers to the fact that this is probably the most pathetic temper tantrum ever recorded because I’m far too lazy to engage in true hysterics. I almost feel…
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Earth Destroyed by Swarming Pestilence!
I’ve probably written this blog post a million times in my head while trying to sleep at night. I’ve written it so well behind my eyelids that I’ll probably never be able to write it that way in real life. But I’m going to try even though it might be inelegant. It’s a controversial topic…
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Anxiety, Endo and Decisions = I Don’t Know
I’m at a loss for what to write about next. I have several drafts sitting here that I’m not sure I should post and I’m still kind of decompressing after surgery last week. I’m not sure what people want to hear. Generally the positive helpful posts are much better received than the down and out…
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I’m Stressing You Out
Occasionally I check Goodreads to see what people think of Angst. I’ll tell you, it’s hard sometimes to see that someone rated your book as 2 stars when you feel like you’ve poured out your heart and soul, exposing your inner feelings and essentially how crazy you are, especially when you’re not sure why they…
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Swim Away into Oblivion
My never ending lament To escape this jail cell A heavy chain hangs about my neck Dragging me down to the depths of the dark sea Pressure against my lungs, collapse Sinking Sinking Struggle, panic, I want out To cut the chains I must breathe But I can’t! I can’t! Sucking in dirty water Choking,…
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What Every Writer Wants
Every writer wants to be heard. Wants their ideas, emotions, worlds to be ingested, inhaled by readers. We want readers to live in our world, the one we created, the one that is us, even if it isn’t. And words, words are my friends. They are how I communicate, they are how I express who…
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Until You See The Holes Cut Out Of Heaven
I awoke to the sounds of the alarm Blaring, screaming, Wake up, get up, get your lazy ass up Immediately, start the day, start it up Rev it high and then change gears Smoothly first to second, The engine bucks and you jerk Forward The hot water gasps and sputters Time to start the race…
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As You Slowly Light Your Never Ending Cigarette
I’ve got a few posts in my head right now and even a few drafts here on WordPress, but for some reason I can’t seem to decide what to write. Definitely content creation FAIL. I’m thinking about writing styles, about Pinterest, about my book, about self-criticism, about so many different things. Even about poems and…
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Black Friday Crusades
Hello All on this lovely Black Friday! I’m here to tell you why Black Friday is the WORST invention EVER!! I feel a little rant coming on. I think it’s pretty funny that we’ve got this holiday where we’re supposed to be loving…
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Nature’s Fail: Exercise
I’m really intent on blaming someone (even if it’s not actually a person) for my problems. My latest conjecture is that it’s nature’s fault that I don’t exercise and I’m going to prove to you (as if I’m writing a geometry proof) that…
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Complain-a-thon: Traffic
I don’t know why, but when I’m driving is when I seem to find things annoying and ridiculous and stupid. In particular, driving makes me hate humanity. That’s normal, right? Here’s a list of things that I think are stupid (mostly because it…
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My Endometriosis Story
Having a chronic illness is cool. Having several is even better. It’s especially fun when you think one of them might be gone and then it REARS its ugly head yet again and brings you right back to square one, living Groundhog Day all over again. So let’s talk about my Endometriosis story, which I…
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This Season of USA is Lit!
These writers on this season of the USA are doing a bang up job keeping us on the edge of our seats! Let’s just hope they’re not like the writers for LOST! Buckle up for some existential rambling DREAD below! (Don’t worry, it’s not political.) As an aside – I randomly decided to check out…
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As the Earth Tilts…on its Evil Axis
It’s that time of year again when the earth tries to screw those of us in the northern hemisphere by tilting itself away from the beautiful rays of the benevolent sun. Yes, ladies and gentleman, the hours of day light are getting shorter and we’re getting a hell of a lot colder, fast. Damn you…
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The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill
Remember that place the so-called Landfill? I know you’re like…”What? No? What place? I don’t recall anything like that.” (All said while avoiding eye contact). Well, I’m here to point your attention in the direction of your local landfill, filled not with LAND but with plastic and unwanted junk. Remember that place? I know, I…
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Skinny Jeans: Finally, a Reasonable Explanation
For the longest time it’s been very unclear to my why Skinny Jeans are a thing. In fact, I devoted an entire blog post to my musing on the fact that Skinny Jeans do justice to no one and thus are a vast criminal empire where justice doesn’t even exist. But finally, the day has…
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Tears of a Kitten: A Heroic Cat Rescue
Here’s a story for all you cat mothers out there. A story of heroism, kitten crocodile tears, trees, ticks, poison ivy, sneaky cats, darkness and more!! All the elements of a truly epic tale. SO EXCITING!! Several months ago in the early spring, I got home from work late just a little before 8 PM…
Angst Anarchy 