VS

Author Victoria Sawyer

Bring Me To Life

New novel coming soon!

  • Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…

  • Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…

  • My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half.  Prior to this  med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years.  And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…

  • Broken, The Internet Is

    Broken, The Internet Is

    So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…

  • A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling

    A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling

    Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies.  It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead.  I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that.  What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically.  Yes,  yesterday I was…

  • Lemme Hear You Bring the Hype

    So once in a while I get to write new-ish articles for work, as I am the “newsletter” guru.  Today I had to write an article and I thought…why write this all boring and professional?  Why not write it FUN and batshit insane, like I do the blog?  (Sometimes when I’m writing blog posts, they…

  • Crazy Hot Mess = Versatile

    I’ve been given the Versatile Blogger Award.  First off I have to thank Eddie Redvine at a Mentalists Journey for nominating me.  Sometimes I forget that people actually read this blather I write on about!  And it’s really really really really nice to know that people do.  So thank you Eddie!  And if you’d like…

  • Ending the Continuous State of Beautiful Glorious Addictive Wretchedness

    My damn meds are regulating the crazy.  And by regulating, I mean I’m paying taxes, like you do for alcohol or gas.  I’m so regulated that I’ve started this post about 5 times and failed 5 times at finding my usual humor and that has cost me a hefty sum.  Alrighty…start again…what I really want…

  • An Exercise in Writing

    My blog stats recently have been abysmal.  Less than abysmal.  Sad.  Sorry.  Tragic.  I realize that I’ve slacked terribly on promotion of any kind and my frenzy of last year has abated like the calm after a hurricane…. and so I am left with…crickets.  But you know what?  I decided to change my attitude about…

  • Much Biting Ensues; And Sibling Torture (Wolfenstein 3D Edition)

    So a friend sent me a link to this blog…. Hyperbole and a Half.  Allie is freaking awesome and hilarious.  I’ve been manically reading all of her posts over the last few days.  I’m like…stalking her…but not in a stalkerish-stalkery way.  I’m just like…reading the stuff she put out there on the FREE interwebs without…

  • If You’re So Smart, You Rig Up My Life!!

    I’ve been spending a bit of time thinking about submission.  Actually, wait, that’s the wrong word.  That sounds a bit too sexual for what I’m trying to get at…the right word is surrender.  Now get your mind out of the gutter and join me in the untouchable ether of thoughts, emotions, the ego and of…

  • Dammit Write a Blog Post!!

    “Dammit write a blog post for gawd’s sake!!!”  This is what I’ve been saying to myself for the past 2 weeks.  And I have stuff I could write about, but I’ve been refusing to write ANYTHING at all.  It’s the holidays afterall and I’ve been super ridic busy and yes, lazy as sin.  Santa should…

  • Lemme Hear You Bring the Hype

    So once in a while I get to write new-ish articles for work, as I am the “newsletter” guru.  Today I had to write an article and I thought…why write this all boring and professional?  Why not write it FUN and batshit insane, like I do the blog?  (Sometimes when I’m writing blog posts, they…

  • New Friends, Anxiety Relief, Creativity Fail and Inspiration Desperation

    Coherence be damned! This is gonna be a weird post.  I have so many random things going on in my head.  I feel like these are the most uninteresting posts to read where someone writes about several things…but unfortunately for you, I’ve got nothing else that’s inspiring me at the moment that would make a…

  • This Season of USA is Lit!

    This Season of USA is Lit!

    These writers on this season of the USA are doing a bang up job keeping us on the edge of our seats! Let’s just hope they’re not like the writers for LOST! Buckle up for some existential rambling DREAD below! (Don’t worry, it’s…

  • The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill

    The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill

    Remember that place the so-called Landfill? I know you’re like…”What? No? What place? I don’t recall anything like that.” (All said while avoiding eye contact). Well, I’m here to point your attention in the direction of your local landfill, filled not with LAND…

  • This is Why We’re All Overweight

    This is Why We’re All Overweight

    I’ve done a little thinking on the topic and I’ve come up with several reason why we’re all overweight and continue to gain the old lbs. The equation looks something like this: unhappiness + depression + meaninglessness + boredom + our modern culture…

  • A Strictly “Adult” Birthday

    A Strictly “Adult” Birthday

    I recently celebrated a birthday which I kept strictly adult.  And by strictly adult, I’m referring to the fact that there’s no way I received toys intended for children for my 33rd birthday celebration. But before we debate my adult-hood status, let’s start out with how Mr. VS received a bonus at work a few weeks before…

  • Resting Bitch Face Syndrome

    Resting Bitch Face Syndrome

    People across the world finally have a name for a disorder they’ve been suffering from for years: Resting Bitch Face Syndrome (RBFS). RBFS sufferers no longer have to suffer in silence! Now that their disorder is finally being taken seriously by society, there is hope for a cure or at the very least understanding and…

  • I Got No Time for Egos

    I Got No Time for Egos

    You know what drives me nuts? Big Double-Whopper Egos. They annoy me and give me indigestion and high blood pressure. Ain’t NOBODY got TIME for EGOS! They’re the reason that so much in society and the world goes shitty. Because people have too much wrapped up in their damn egos. It’s why people can’t admit they’re…

  • Overcoming Impostor Syndrome as a Photographer
  • Vampires be Chillin’ at My House

    Vampires be Chillin’ at My House

    This week it’s LADIES NIGHT!! Be sure to visit the other FBF bloggers (their links are at the bottom of the post)! At my house, we’ve got a serious domestic vampire problem. It’s getting really bad because the cats are hanging out with them in the yard, chillaxin’ in the long grass, hanging out under…

  • Your Viewing Pleasure – Drunk History

    Your Viewing Pleasure – Drunk History

    For your viewing pleasure, a bit of Drunk History, as told by some drunk motherfuckas and acted out by Hollywood’s best.  Ummm..amazing!!

  • Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…

  • Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…

  • My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half.  Prior to this  med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years.  And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…

“Sometimes the darkness makes the light seem brighter.”

Victoria Sawyer

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