VS
Author Victoria Sawyer


Bring Me To Life
New novel coming soon!
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Sexy Canning = Botulism
Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…
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Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead
I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…
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My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland
So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half. Prior to this med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years. And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…
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Broken, The Internet Is
So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…
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A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling
Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies. It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead. I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that. What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically. Yes, yesterday I was…
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An Exercise in Writing
My blog stats recently have been abysmal. Less than abysmal. Sad. Sorry. Tragic. I realize that I’ve slacked terribly on promotion of any kind and my frenzy of last year has abated like the calm after a hurricane…. and so I am left with…crickets. But you know what? I decided to change my attitude about…
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Today I Choose Happiness
I love this! A great summation of all the things I’ve been thinking about lately. Happiness is a choice…and today I will choose to be happy. Will you make that choice today too? It’s in your control…and yours alone! Today i choose happiness. via Today I Choose Happiness.
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Much Biting Ensues; And Sibling Torture (Wolfenstein 3D Edition)
So a friend sent me a link to this blog…. Hyperbole and a Half. Allie is freaking awesome and hilarious. I’ve been manically reading all of her posts over the last few days. I’m like…stalking her…but not in a stalkerish-stalkery way. I’m just like…reading the stuff she put out there on the FREE interwebs without…
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Like Me, Oh Please Like Me!
Ok we’re getting a little desperate around these parts lately in the “tone” of our posts. Note to self, stop being disgusting! haha. I kid! I want you guys to like my new Facebook page! I need 30 likes before I can pick my own url etc, so get over there and help a sister…
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Winner! And My V-Day Poem Explained!
So, amazingly, somehow, don’t ask me how, the winner of my raffle is Jocelyn Dex! I swear to you guys on everything I hold dear that I didn’t rig this thing! I just hit the button for Rafflecopter to let me know who the winner was and her name literally popped up. So, congrats Jocelyn! …
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Imagine a Sexy Raging Frat Party
Sexy, scandalous and…crazy. Let me take you on a journey in your imagination: Imagine a raging Halloween party at a dirty frat. Imagine a small college party at an apartment just off campus, smoke billowing through the air from a glass pipe as you inhale and exhale, coughing, suddenly lightheaded and…free. Imagine playing asshole with…
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From the Business End of a Loaded Handgun
Hello All, in honor of my book being available for purchase today on Amazon, here, I wanted to share this serious post about Suicide as this is one of the themes that is dealt with in my novel. Now whatever you do, do not look up suicide on google images like I just did, there…
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I’m Just a Day Away!
Hi all, just a quick update. I’m really excited because I’m very close to publishing my novel. I’m doing a final reading now to catch any last formatting, grammatical or other errors and then I’m uploading my novel! I can’t believe I’ve come this far. Stay tuned and I’ll let you know when it’s finally…
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This Season of USA is Lit!
These writers on this season of the USA are doing a bang up job keeping us on the edge of our seats! Let’s just hope they’re not like the writers for LOST! Buckle up for some existential rambling DREAD below! (Don’t worry, it’s…
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The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill
Remember that place the so-called Landfill? I know you’re like…”What? No? What place? I don’t recall anything like that.” (All said while avoiding eye contact). Well, I’m here to point your attention in the direction of your local landfill, filled not with LAND…
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This is Why We’re All Overweight
I’ve done a little thinking on the topic and I’ve come up with several reason why we’re all overweight and continue to gain the old lbs. The equation looks something like this: unhappiness + depression + meaninglessness + boredom + our modern culture…
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Friday Obsession-Thoughts: Gifs and Funny Blogs
YEAH It’s the FRIZZ!! How happy are you? The Frizz is the best day of the work week. And when it hits end-o’-work o’clock then it’s the best day/time of the weekend too! All in all, a sweet day. This week I’m obsessed with 2 things. Gifs and Funny blogs. For example, here’s one blog…
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Tandem Sleeping
When I write Tandem Sleeping it makes me laugh. It reminds me of slalom or something or for some reason bob sledding. Why? Why? Anyway, I want to write about sleeping with someone else. It’s weird. In particular I’m going to tell you about sleeping with Mr. VS. Doesn’t that sound like fun and/or inappropriate? …
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A New Addiction Cometh: Coffee
I’ve recently added a new addiction to my collection: coffee. (I do collect addictions even though I make claim to NOT having an addictive personality. FYI, the things that I claim are always strongly suspect.) Regarding Coffee, I never thought this addiction would happen to me. I thought I was immune to Coffee’s charms. But…
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I Am Full of Bullshit: My Best Quotes on Angst
I’ve decided to collect together for your enjoyment and LOL’ing (still I shudder) an assortment of crazy, strange and yes, awesome quotes from my favorite Angst posts. I can and do amuse myself all the time (perhaps I’m the only one?). So…brace yourselves for genius (I’m so full of shit I can’t even let that…
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Optimizing SEO for Maximum Angst
In learning recently about SEO, I’ve realized that I do a terrible job of catering to my old friend Google. Or Bing or Chrome or Jeeves or Yahoo or whomever rules my online searchability status (they treat me like a peasant, when clearly I’m deserving of royalty status. I am QUEEN!). Honestly, I don’t like…
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Uncanned Laughter: Post O’ the Day
I’m responding to a Post O’ the Day! Here’s the prompt: “A misused word, a misremembered song lyric, a cream pie that just happened to be there: tell us about a time you (or someone else) said or did something unintentionally funny. ” When I went camping a year ago with friends, we had the…



