VS

Author Victoria Sawyer

Bring Me To Life

New novel coming soon!

  • Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…

  • Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…

  • My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half.  Prior to this  med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years.  And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…

  • Broken, The Internet Is

    Broken, The Internet Is

    So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…

  • A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling

    A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling

    Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies.  It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead.  I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that.  What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically.  Yes,  yesterday I was…

  • Work-Life Balance: Why Having Children is a Choice

    At work the other day I went to a conference with other Administrative Professionals.  In one of the sessions called “Work/Life Balance” we were supposed to learn how to balance having a full time job and a fulfilling life.  As we went around the room, sharing our experiences, I was put to shame to realize…

  • Failure the Musical!!!! STARRING MEEEE!!!

    AKA:  A Catalog of Woes: The Year in Review I know it’s not necessarily the time of year to be doing a year in review, but I have a need to see all my woes laid out in a humorous way for the enjoyment of the citizens of Interwebs Township.  I want to be your…

  • In Which I Answer Some Burning Questions

    I was nominated for the Liebster Award by Katherine from the Library Life.  Thanks for nominating me!  And now I will answer some questions about reading, writing and not arithmetic. 1. What’s your favourite topic to blog about? Why? I love blogging about anything and everything.  But my favorite…is probably anything humorous.  I love sarcasm,…

  • The Last Option

    In honor of Mental Illness Awareness Week…I offer you a short story about suffering from mental illness. Will you take the time to spread the word, to spread acceptance, empathy and compassion? Everyone knows someone who suffers, even if you don’t realize it, for many suffer alone. Are you willing to make it a bit…

  • Getting My Muse Stinkin’ Drunk

    Getting My Muse Stinkin’ Drunk

    This might well be my most ill-advised, irresponsible blog post yet.  However, it’s not like someone else advised me not to write this.  I advised myself that it was wrong, then battled it out in my head and….yeah I won.  So here goes nothing!! (afterall, I’ve never let inhibitions get in my way before! Just…

  • Writers: Stop Writing and Live

    Sometimes writing isn’t writing, sometimes to write you need to stop writing.  This just occurred to me as I sat here listening to music and emotion suddenly infected me with a sense of joy, love, clarity.  What I realized is that writers need breaks.  Sometimes we have to live or our stories will not be…

  • Queen For a Day. Or Two. Screw that, Queen Foreva!!

    So you’ve heard my woes, here and here, about my meds causing me to suffer the agony of a life without creativity and without…gasp…sleep.  Yes, it was hell.  I know, the kinds of problems I have…pathetic.  You also heard my woes damning anxiety absolutely to hell and back again because it was driving me up…

  • DAMN YOU ANXIETY!!

    I’m going to apply for a job. Last night I lay awake in bed for hours going over every aspect of the job description that makes me nervous and with every anxious thought, I thought DAMN YOU ANXIETY!!  And of course with every thought, I imagined how I can’t handle it, how I’ll crumble, how…

  • Adult Temper Tantrums Are Allowed.

    I’m throwing the worst temper tantrum ever.  Now before you start imagining me kicking and screaming, I need to clue you in on what that means.  Worst refers to the fact that this is probably the most pathetic temper tantrum ever recorded because I’m far too lazy to engage in true hysterics.  I almost feel…

  • This Season of USA is Lit!

    This Season of USA is Lit!

    These writers on this season of the USA are doing a bang up job keeping us on the edge of our seats! Let’s just hope they’re not like the writers for LOST! Buckle up for some existential rambling DREAD below! (Don’t worry, it’s…

  • The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill

    The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill

    Remember that place the so-called Landfill? I know you’re like…”What? No? What place? I don’t recall anything like that.” (All said while avoiding eye contact). Well, I’m here to point your attention in the direction of your local landfill, filled not with LAND…

  • This is Why We’re All Overweight

    This is Why We’re All Overweight

    I’ve done a little thinking on the topic and I’ve come up with several reason why we’re all overweight and continue to gain the old lbs. The equation looks something like this: unhappiness + depression + meaninglessness + boredom + our modern culture…

  • What Kind of Strange Godforsaken Place is This?

    So, if you’re new to this site, like an intrepid (love this word) space traveler who has stumbled upon a strange and clearly godforsaken (also love this word) alien world, you might begin to ask yourself, what the hell kind of place is this?  What does it mean!  By god, Captain Kirk, where are we???!!! …

  • 26 Ways Cats Gleefully and Shamelessly Annoy Humans

    As much as I love cats, I also realize that they are insane.  Much like me.  (I’m already turning into a crazy cat lady who wants to talk about her cat ALL the time.  It’s like G (Bitey) is my child.  Seriously.)  So cats in general like to do things that are the complete opposite…

  • The Many, Many, Many Things That Bring The Too Funny Chicks Angst

    Are you ready for an angst-fest?  Wanna get angst-tastic?  My pals/gals over at Too Funny Chicks agreed to write a guest blog post for me and decided to share with my readers their “angst” and of course…you’re gonna laugh and you’re gonna nod your head because some of this stuff gives you heart palpitations and…

  • Wife Competitions of Which We are Unaware

    This title just gets me.  It’s like backward.  Anyway…don’t get it into your little sick heads that this is about wife swapping or anything so scandalous as all that.  Although of course that’s the first place my sick little head went as I wrote this even though I know what I’m going to write about. …

  • Pity Party for 2! Whoohooo!

    Sometimes you need a pity party.  Sometimes you don’t know you need one and someone hosts one for you anyway and doesn’t tell you it’s gonna be tomorrow at noon and when you show up where you always show up on Tuesdays at noon, there it is, waiting for you.  Surprise!!  It’s a surprise pity…

  • Decoy Duck

    I have a new friend and he’s a decoy duck.  He’s old and his black paint is wearing off.  He’s sort of cool, if you’re into that kind of thing, although he doesn’t have a fancy paint job or racing stripes. He’s a pretty plain guy and my cat tries to body slam him on…

  • Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…

  • Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…

  • My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half.  Prior to this  med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years.  And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…

“Sometimes the darkness makes the light seem brighter.”

Victoria Sawyer

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