VS

Author Victoria Sawyer

Bring Me To Life

New novel coming soon!

  • Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…

  • Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…

  • My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half.  Prior to this  med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years.  And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…

  • Broken, The Internet Is

    Broken, The Internet Is

    So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…

  • A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling

    A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling

    Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies.  It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead.  I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that.  What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically.  Yes,  yesterday I was…

  • I Made Words: Anarchy!!

    Anarchy, Anarchy, Government Grammar is evil!!! I don’t know if you know, but I’m an English major with an actual BA (Bad Ass)degree in English.  Does that mean that I am certified to speak English you ask?  Don’t be an asshole!  (I am certified for that, BTW, but it’s not the only thing we English…

  • Anxiety Percentages: From 0% to 10%

    In completing my weekly reading for therapy with the book Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life, one thing has become abundantly clear to me.  Everyone, at some point or other experiences anxiety in their lives.  It’s part of the human experience and no one is immune. Some of us though, experience perhaps…

  • Ahhh!!! Realization: I’m a Sci-Fi Nerd!!!

    Oh God, oh God, oh God.  Oh GOD!!!! PANIC!!! OH GAWD SAVE MEEEE!! Ok, take a deep breath, everything’s gonna be alright. Hee…heee…heee…head between knees…deep breathing…. gasp….can’t breathe…heart pounding with terrible truth!!! It’s okay, calm, soothe, calm, soothe.  Serenity Nowwwww!! Haaa!!  It’s funny when you go through life without noticing a certain pattern and then…

  • Bring Me To Life – New Fiction in the works!

    Bring Me To Life – New Fiction in the works!

    After more than 13 years I’ve started writing again and I picked up a story I started back in 2010. It’s a gritty, dark, sexy modern fairytale – a Sleeping Beauty reboot inspired by sex, drugs & rock n’ roll! Back in 2010 I was inspired by Evanescence’s song of the same name as well…

  • Your Exclamation Points are Hurting My Ears!

    Your Exclamation Points are Hurting My Ears!

    The other day my ears were acting cray-cray and suddenly everything seemed really really loud. (Damn cold!)  Mr. VS was trying to have a normal conversation with me and I had to shush him like 5 times. He was screaming! And then I went to work and everyone there was yelling like a bunch of…

  • 7 Sneaky Ways to Destroy Writer’s Block

    7 Sneaky Ways to Destroy Writer’s Block

    We’ve all been there, staring at the blank page, cursor maddeningly blinking away with absolutely nothing in our boring heads.  It’s a terrifying feeling when there’s this black void in the space where genius is supposed to live.  We begin to wonder, have we lost our golden touch? Have all our stunning ideas dried up and…

  • Insta-Replay for Bloggers, Writers and Artists

    Insta-Replay for Bloggers, Writers and Artists

    I was watching the news this morning and they were doing a recap of high school football and they kept showing instant replays of all the amazing catches and long runs that the high school students were doing at their foose-ball games. There were even hometown heros and VIP’s and whatnot.  I thought to myself…it must be pretty snazzy…

  • Are Bloggers Self-Centered Nitwits?

    Are Bloggers Self-Centered Nitwits?

    I read an article the other day that seemed to be crassly implying (okay, outright stating) that Bloggers are self-centered nitwits. That we write about ourselves because we’re obsessed with ourselves and that people who are not self absorbed wouldn’t be sitting there writing about themselves all the time. I gotta call bullshit on this.  Because…

  • I Am Full of Bullshit: My Best Quotes on Angst

    I Am Full of Bullshit: My Best Quotes on Angst

    I’ve decided to collect together for your enjoyment and LOL’ing (still I shudder) an assortment of crazy, strange and yes, awesome quotes from my favorite Angst posts.  I can and do amuse myself all the time (perhaps I’m the only one?).  So…brace yourselves for genius (I’m so full of shit I can’t even let that…

  • Black Friday Crusades

    Black Friday Crusades

    Hello All on this lovely Black Friday!  I’m here to tell you why Black Friday is the WORST invention EVER!!  I feel a little rant coming on. I think it’s pretty funny that we’ve got this holiday where we’re supposed to be loving…

  • Nature’s Fail:  Exercise

    Nature’s Fail: Exercise

    I’m really intent on blaming someone (even if it’s not actually a person) for my problems. My latest conjecture is that it’s nature’s fault that I don’t exercise and I’m going to prove to you (as if I’m writing a geometry proof) that…

  • Complain-a-thon: Traffic

    Complain-a-thon: Traffic

    I don’t know why, but when I’m driving is when I seem to find things annoying and ridiculous and stupid.  In particular, driving makes me hate humanity.  That’s normal, right? Here’s a list of things that I think are stupid (mostly because it…

  • A Love Song for Mr. VS Regarding Hoarding

    It’s recently come to my attention that Mr. Victoria Sawyer would like to take up hoarding as a hobby. He has an interest in hoarding, I think, because he’s seen how enjoyable it is for people in his family.  So he thought he’d try it out too.  It’s NOT cool!!! Mr. VS loves going to…

  • Friend-cation and Camping Sucks

    I just went on the most fun friend-cation ever!  BEST TIME EVER!!  YOLO fools!!!  (We were all about yelling YOLO about anything and everything because we hate it so much.  YOLO is dumb (as is Facebook and everyone’s obnox posts about themselves).  It’s something you’d yell while doing a keg stand, however it’s actually trying…

  • I Abused Photoshop Just For You

    Here’s another one of those things that just blows your mind.  PHOTOSHOP!!  I’m actually a photoshop user, but I don’t really abuse it like some people do.  I don’t flog the ‘shop.  However, for you, for today, I decided to do it.  Abuse!!  (Also this post is NEWLY updated, by popular demand, with the original…

  • Studying the Male of the Species and Boy Eyes

    Do you live with a man?  Do you know one?  Have you ever interacted with the male of the species?  You know…those ones that aren’t female?  Yeah, those guys.  You’ve seen them around, I’m sure.  They’re everywhere.  And yes, if you’re female,  you’ve probably been ogled by these so-called “males” of the species.  You know…

  • Just FYI – Submarines

    FYI – Submarines Just an FYI that Mr. VS might have something to do with submarines existing in the world.  I just want to make that clear.  Also over the weekend while we were camping (more on that later) and were swimming in the lake, I climbed on Mr. VS’s back and said loudly…..DIVE DIVE…

  • Sanctioning Cat Fights:  Bitey and the Gentleman

    Sanctioning Cat Fights: Bitey and the Gentleman

    My husband claims that I am promoting cat fights.  And not just promoting, but organizing, advertising and preparing the combatants. He is wrong, of course.  I’m doing nothing of the sort, because animal fights are inhumane. (weird how human is a part of the word inhumane but it can apply to many species??  We are…

  • Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…

  • Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…

  • My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half.  Prior to this  med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years.  And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…

“Sometimes the darkness makes the light seem brighter.”

Victoria Sawyer

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