VS

Author Victoria Sawyer

Bring Me To Life

New novel coming soon!

  • Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…

  • Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…

  • My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half.  Prior to this  med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years.  And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…

  • Broken, The Internet Is

    Broken, The Internet Is

    So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…

  • A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling

    A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling

    Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies.  It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead.  I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that.  What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically.  Yes,  yesterday I was…

  • A Wooden Anniversary with Hiking

    A Wooden Anniversary with Hiking

    Mr. VS and I just celebrated our “Wooden” Anniversary.  For those not in the know, a wooden anniversary is 5 years and Mr. VS and I are enjoying wooden wedded bliss  Thus we celebrate.  It’s lame because once you get up there in years for anniversaries you get to have silver or gold anniversaries, a…

  • Submitting to the Sickness

    Per usual I have obtained through no fault of my own (I swear) my typical September Cold.  YEEEHAWWW.  So very thrilling I can’t even contain myself as I wave my tissue pom-poms in the air with a barely mustered excitement. I don’t know what it is, but as soon as September rolls around I always…

  • Getting Social with the Locals

    Getting Social with the Locals

    Have you ever attempted to get social, face to face? Like actual FACE TIME in the REAL WORLD? And no, I don’t mean the program Face Time online. I mean like REAL in person, social media. Or just social, without the media.  Like Media-free socializing.  Saying it that way sounds so naughty!  NO protection at…

  • Bring Me To Life – New Fiction in the works!

    Bring Me To Life – New Fiction in the works!

    After more than 13 years I’ve started writing again and I picked up a story I started back in 2010. It’s a gritty, dark, sexy modern fairytale – a Sleeping Beauty reboot inspired by sex, drugs & rock n’ roll! Back in 2010 I was inspired by Evanescence’s song of the same name as well…

  • Your Exclamation Points are Hurting My Ears!

    Your Exclamation Points are Hurting My Ears!

    The other day my ears were acting cray-cray and suddenly everything seemed really really loud. (Damn cold!)  Mr. VS was trying to have a normal conversation with me and I had to shush him like 5 times. He was screaming! And then I went to work and everyone there was yelling like a bunch of…

  • 7 Sneaky Ways to Destroy Writer’s Block

    7 Sneaky Ways to Destroy Writer’s Block

    We’ve all been there, staring at the blank page, cursor maddeningly blinking away with absolutely nothing in our boring heads.  It’s a terrifying feeling when there’s this black void in the space where genius is supposed to live.  We begin to wonder, have we lost our golden touch? Have all our stunning ideas dried up and…

  • Insta-Replay for Bloggers, Writers and Artists

    Insta-Replay for Bloggers, Writers and Artists

    I was watching the news this morning and they were doing a recap of high school football and they kept showing instant replays of all the amazing catches and long runs that the high school students were doing at their foose-ball games. There were even hometown heros and VIP’s and whatnot.  I thought to myself…it must be pretty snazzy…

  • Are Bloggers Self-Centered Nitwits?

    Are Bloggers Self-Centered Nitwits?

    I read an article the other day that seemed to be crassly implying (okay, outright stating) that Bloggers are self-centered nitwits. That we write about ourselves because we’re obsessed with ourselves and that people who are not self absorbed wouldn’t be sitting there writing about themselves all the time. I gotta call bullshit on this.  Because…

  • I Am Full of Bullshit: My Best Quotes on Angst

    I Am Full of Bullshit: My Best Quotes on Angst

    I’ve decided to collect together for your enjoyment and LOL’ing (still I shudder) an assortment of crazy, strange and yes, awesome quotes from my favorite Angst posts.  I can and do amuse myself all the time (perhaps I’m the only one?).  So…brace yourselves for genius (I’m so full of shit I can’t even let that…

  • My Brain is Technology

    My Brain is Technology

    I think my Brain might be hiding things from me.  In fact, I know my brain is hiding shit. Have you ever really given your brain a thought?  Brains are weird-ass shit.  I started thinking about my brain in the middle of the…

  • The Term “Plus-Size” Pisses Me Off.

    The Term “Plus-Size” Pisses Me Off.

    The other day I was reading this article on Yahoo:  How Shopping with a Plus-sized Model Made Me Face My Own Body Issues.  And I started getting pissed off and fired up about the word Plus Size.  WTF kind of word is that? …

  • Weight Gain Extravaganza

    Weight Gain Extravaganza

    Recently I came to the conclusion that we have so many feelings and emotions and thoughts and self-flagellation and judging of others involved in our weight.  I know, I’m a genius for realizing this super obvious emotional response.  However, the thought that occurred…

  • A Love Song for Mr. VS Regarding Hoarding

    It’s recently come to my attention that Mr. Victoria Sawyer would like to take up hoarding as a hobby. He has an interest in hoarding, I think, because he’s seen how enjoyable it is for people in his family.  So he thought he’d try it out too.  It’s NOT cool!!! Mr. VS loves going to…

  • Friend-cation and Camping Sucks

    I just went on the most fun friend-cation ever!  BEST TIME EVER!!  YOLO fools!!!  (We were all about yelling YOLO about anything and everything because we hate it so much.  YOLO is dumb (as is Facebook and everyone’s obnox posts about themselves).  It’s something you’d yell while doing a keg stand, however it’s actually trying…

  • I Abused Photoshop Just For You

    Here’s another one of those things that just blows your mind.  PHOTOSHOP!!  I’m actually a photoshop user, but I don’t really abuse it like some people do.  I don’t flog the ‘shop.  However, for you, for today, I decided to do it.  Abuse!!  (Also this post is NEWLY updated, by popular demand, with the original…

  • Studying the Male of the Species and Boy Eyes

    Do you live with a man?  Do you know one?  Have you ever interacted with the male of the species?  You know…those ones that aren’t female?  Yeah, those guys.  You’ve seen them around, I’m sure.  They’re everywhere.  And yes, if you’re female,  you’ve probably been ogled by these so-called “males” of the species.  You know…

  • Just FYI – Submarines

    FYI – Submarines Just an FYI that Mr. VS might have something to do with submarines existing in the world.  I just want to make that clear.  Also over the weekend while we were camping (more on that later) and were swimming in the lake, I climbed on Mr. VS’s back and said loudly…..DIVE DIVE…

  • Sanctioning Cat Fights:  Bitey and the Gentleman

    Sanctioning Cat Fights: Bitey and the Gentleman

    My husband claims that I am promoting cat fights.  And not just promoting, but organizing, advertising and preparing the combatants. He is wrong, of course.  I’m doing nothing of the sort, because animal fights are inhumane. (weird how human is a part of the word inhumane but it can apply to many species??  We are…

  • Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…

  • Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…

  • My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half.  Prior to this  med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years.  And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…

“Sometimes the darkness makes the light seem brighter.”

Victoria Sawyer

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