VS
Author Victoria Sawyer
Bring Me To Life
New novel coming soon!
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Sexy Canning = Botulism
Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…
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Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead
I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…
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My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland
So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half. Prior to this med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years. And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…
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Broken, The Internet Is
So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…
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A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling
Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies. It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead. I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that. What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically. Yes, yesterday I was…
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Complain-a-thon: Traffic
I don’t know why, but when I’m driving is when I seem to find things annoying and ridiculous and stupid. In particular, driving makes me hate humanity. That’s normal, right? Here’s a list of things that I think are stupid (mostly because it makes me have anxiety about my MPG. Seriously I have anxiety/irritation about…
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My Brain is Technology
I think my Brain might be hiding things from me. In fact, I know my brain is hiding shit. Have you ever really given your brain a thought? Brains are weird-ass shit. I started thinking about my brain in the middle of the night the other night, I know, extremely random, and what I was…
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The Term “Plus-Size” Pisses Me Off.
The other day I was reading this article on Yahoo: How Shopping with a Plus-sized Model Made Me Face My Own Body Issues. And I started getting pissed off and fired up about the word Plus Size. WTF kind of word is that? Who invented that shit? To me that’s an offensive term for women…
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I Made Words: Anarchy!!
Anarchy, Anarchy, Government Grammar is evil!!! I don’t know if you know, but I’m an English major with an actual BA (Bad Ass)degree in English. Does that mean that I am certified to speak English you ask? Don’t be an asshole! (I am certified for that, BTW, but it’s not the only thing we English…
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The Importance of Voice in Non-Fiction
This is a guest blog post from Nickolas Baron from Grammarly (a free proofreading tool for writers). It’s his take on the importance of voice and trust me, I agree! Voice is incredibly important, no matter what kind of writing you’re attempting. An interesting narrator will get you everywhere! Read on for tips on writing…
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What Kind of Strange Godforsaken Place is This?
So, if you’re new to this site, like an intrepid (love this word) space traveler who has stumbled upon a strange and clearly godforsaken (also love this word) alien world, you might begin to ask yourself, what the hell kind of place is this? What does it mean! By god, Captain Kirk, where are we???!!! …
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This Season of USA is Lit!
These writers on this season of the USA are doing a bang up job keeping us on the edge of our seats! Let’s just hope they’re not like the writers for LOST! Buckle up for some existential rambling DREAD below! (Don’t worry, it’s…
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The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill
Remember that place the so-called Landfill? I know you’re like…”What? No? What place? I don’t recall anything like that.” (All said while avoiding eye contact). Well, I’m here to point your attention in the direction of your local landfill, filled not with LAND…
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This is Why We’re All Overweight
I’ve done a little thinking on the topic and I’ve come up with several reason why we’re all overweight and continue to gain the old lbs. The equation looks something like this: unhappiness + depression + meaninglessness + boredom + our modern culture…
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Friend-cation and Camping Sucks
I just went on the most fun friend-cation ever! BEST TIME EVER!! YOLO fools!!! (We were all about yelling YOLO about anything and everything because we hate it so much. YOLO is dumb (as is Facebook and everyone’s obnox posts about themselves). It’s something you’d yell while doing a keg stand, however it’s actually trying…
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I Abused Photoshop Just For You
Here’s another one of those things that just blows your mind. PHOTOSHOP!! I’m actually a photoshop user, but I don’t really abuse it like some people do. I don’t flog the ‘shop. However, for you, for today, I decided to do it. Abuse!! (Also this post is NEWLY updated, by popular demand, with the original…
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Studying the Male of the Species and Boy Eyes
Do you live with a man? Do you know one? Have you ever interacted with the male of the species? You know…those ones that aren’t female? Yeah, those guys. You’ve seen them around, I’m sure. They’re everywhere. And yes, if you’re female, you’ve probably been ogled by these so-called “males” of the species. You know…
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Just FYI – Submarines
FYI – Submarines Just an FYI that Mr. VS might have something to do with submarines existing in the world. I just want to make that clear. Also over the weekend while we were camping (more on that later) and were swimming in the lake, I climbed on Mr. VS’s back and said loudly…..DIVE DIVE…
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Sanctioning Cat Fights: Bitey and the Gentleman
My husband claims that I am promoting cat fights. And not just promoting, but organizing, advertising and preparing the combatants. He is wrong, of course. I’m doing nothing of the sort, because animal fights are inhumane. (weird how human is a part of the word inhumane but it can apply to many species?? We are…
Angst Anarchy 