VS
Author Victoria Sawyer
Bring Me To Life
New novel coming soon!
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Sexy Canning = Botulism
Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…
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Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead
I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…
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My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland
So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half. Prior to this med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years. And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…
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Broken, The Internet Is
So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…
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A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling
Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies. It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead. I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that. What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically. Yes, yesterday I was…
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Nature’s Fail: Exercise
I’m really intent on blaming someone (even if it’s not actually a person) for my problems. My latest conjecture is that it’s nature’s fault that I don’t exercise and I’m going to prove to you (as if I’m writing a geometry proof) that nature is in fact to blame for the fact that I’m lazy…
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I Solved Climate Change and Silenced the Alien Laughter
Yup, you heard it here first, I have, with my puny little brain, solved Climate Change in one fell swoop (what does that mean?). I’m for serious right now (I love saying that). For realz. It’s essentially pretty simple and is called: Working from Home. If I asked it as a question and you said…
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Guest Post: My “Lady Areas” Are Guilty of Attempted Murder
I promised I’d write about how my “Lady Areas” are guilty of attempted murder and I’ve followed through by asking the AhMAZING Katie of Sass and Balderdash to post it as a guest blog (rant) on her blog. Check it out! My areas are card carrying killer assassins!
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Bring Me To Life – New Fiction in the works!
After more than 13 years I’ve started writing again and I picked up a story I started back in 2010. It’s a gritty, dark, sexy modern fairytale – a Sleeping Beauty reboot inspired by sex, drugs & rock n’ roll! Back in 2010 I was inspired by Evanescence’s song of the same name as well…
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Your Exclamation Points are Hurting My Ears!
The other day my ears were acting cray-cray and suddenly everything seemed really really loud. (Damn cold!) Mr. VS was trying to have a normal conversation with me and I had to shush him like 5 times. He was screaming! And then I went to work and everyone there was yelling like a bunch of…
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7 Sneaky Ways to Destroy Writer’s Block
We’ve all been there, staring at the blank page, cursor maddeningly blinking away with absolutely nothing in our boring heads. It’s a terrifying feeling when there’s this black void in the space where genius is supposed to live. We begin to wonder, have we lost our golden touch? Have all our stunning ideas dried up and…
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Insta-Replay for Bloggers, Writers and Artists
I was watching the news this morning and they were doing a recap of high school football and they kept showing instant replays of all the amazing catches and long runs that the high school students were doing at their foose-ball games. There were even hometown heros and VIP’s and whatnot. I thought to myself…it must be pretty snazzy…
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Are Bloggers Self-Centered Nitwits?
I read an article the other day that seemed to be crassly implying (okay, outright stating) that Bloggers are self-centered nitwits. That we write about ourselves because we’re obsessed with ourselves and that people who are not self absorbed wouldn’t be sitting there writing about themselves all the time. I gotta call bullshit on this. Because…
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I Am Full of Bullshit: My Best Quotes on Angst
I’ve decided to collect together for your enjoyment and LOL’ing (still I shudder) an assortment of crazy, strange and yes, awesome quotes from my favorite Angst posts. I can and do amuse myself all the time (perhaps I’m the only one?). So…brace yourselves for genius (I’m so full of shit I can’t even let that…
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My Brain is Technology
I think my Brain might be hiding things from me. In fact, I know my brain is hiding shit. Have you ever really given your brain a thought? Brains are weird-ass shit. I started thinking about my brain in the middle of the…
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The Term “Plus-Size” Pisses Me Off.
The other day I was reading this article on Yahoo: How Shopping with a Plus-sized Model Made Me Face My Own Body Issues. And I started getting pissed off and fired up about the word Plus Size. WTF kind of word is that? …
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Weight Gain Extravaganza
Recently I came to the conclusion that we have so many feelings and emotions and thoughts and self-flagellation and judging of others involved in our weight. I know, I’m a genius for realizing this super obvious emotional response. However, the thought that occurred…
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Germ-O-Phobe
I’m a certified Germ-o-phobe and I will proclaim and admit all you like. What I’ve realized recently about being a Germ-o is that it’s not really about the germs at all, it’s about my brain. I have to be a Germ-o to satisfy my brain, to basically convince my brain to keep quiet and stay…
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World of Horrors! (Pre-technology)
Did you know that approximately 15 to 20 years ago we didn’t have the technology that we have today? Is it stupid to ask that question? (A: YES!) I feel like I was born at a unique time in modern history because I lived without technology and now I’ve evolved as technology has evolved. For all you youngsters…
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Turn Noun for Bacon
We’re trying out a little experiment for a friend of mine, Jessie of Jessie Janelle Reyna, called Turn Noun For What. It’s basically where a bunch of bloggers create a blog post on command about a certain noun. Today’s word bomb of the day, children, is: Bacon. What can one really say about Bacon? It’s…
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My Short Term Memory is Shot
Lately, my short term memory has been failing at life. It’s taken a nice long vacation and has not returned. It’s getting scary you guys. I used to be so on top of things and now I’m a sad shell of the woman I used to be. Guys, thoughts will appear and then they disappear…
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The “Feeling Hellish” Fairy
I was driving home from work the other day when I started thinking about how shitty I’ve been feeling lately. And whenever I think about how shitty I feel, I think about how I want to “gift” that shitty feeling onto someone else. Like, here ya go, feel how I’m feeling. How does that terrible…
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Small Cat Diary
Mr. VS and I have been watching a show on Netflix entitled Big Cat Diary. It’s a BBC show with a few Brits who travel to Africa and film big cats doing their thang. I.e. hunting, killing shit, having adorbs kittens/cubs, murdering gazelles, fighting among themselves etc. It’s pretty good. But it makes me want…
Angst Anarchy 