VS
Author Victoria Sawyer
Bring Me To Life
New novel coming soon!
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Sexy Canning = Botulism
Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…
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Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead
I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…
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My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland
So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half. Prior to this med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years. And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…
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Broken, The Internet Is
So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…
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A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling
Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies. It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead. I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that. What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically. Yes, yesterday I was…
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Nature’s Fail: Exercise
I’m really intent on blaming someone (even if it’s not actually a person) for my problems. My latest conjecture is that it’s nature’s fault that I don’t exercise and I’m going to prove to you (as if I’m writing a geometry proof) that nature is in fact to blame for the fact that I’m lazy…
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I Solved Climate Change and Silenced the Alien Laughter
Yup, you heard it here first, I have, with my puny little brain, solved Climate Change in one fell swoop (what does that mean?). I’m for serious right now (I love saying that). For realz. It’s essentially pretty simple and is called: Working from Home. If I asked it as a question and you said…
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Guest Post: My “Lady Areas” Are Guilty of Attempted Murder
I promised I’d write about how my “Lady Areas” are guilty of attempted murder and I’ve followed through by asking the AhMAZING Katie of Sass and Balderdash to post it as a guest blog (rant) on her blog. Check it out! My areas are card carrying killer assassins!
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Bring Me To Life – New Fiction in the works!
After more than 13 years I’ve started writing again and I picked up a story I started back in 2010. It’s a gritty, dark, sexy modern fairytale – a Sleeping Beauty reboot inspired by sex, drugs & rock n’ roll! Back in 2010 I was inspired by Evanescence’s song of the same name as well…
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Your Exclamation Points are Hurting My Ears!
The other day my ears were acting cray-cray and suddenly everything seemed really really loud. (Damn cold!) Mr. VS was trying to have a normal conversation with me and I had to shush him like 5 times. He was screaming! And then I went to work and everyone there was yelling like a bunch of…
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7 Sneaky Ways to Destroy Writer’s Block
We’ve all been there, staring at the blank page, cursor maddeningly blinking away with absolutely nothing in our boring heads. It’s a terrifying feeling when there’s this black void in the space where genius is supposed to live. We begin to wonder, have we lost our golden touch? Have all our stunning ideas dried up and…
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Insta-Replay for Bloggers, Writers and Artists
I was watching the news this morning and they were doing a recap of high school football and they kept showing instant replays of all the amazing catches and long runs that the high school students were doing at their foose-ball games. There were even hometown heros and VIP’s and whatnot. I thought to myself…it must be pretty snazzy…
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Are Bloggers Self-Centered Nitwits?
I read an article the other day that seemed to be crassly implying (okay, outright stating) that Bloggers are self-centered nitwits. That we write about ourselves because we’re obsessed with ourselves and that people who are not self absorbed wouldn’t be sitting there writing about themselves all the time. I gotta call bullshit on this. Because…
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I Am Full of Bullshit: My Best Quotes on Angst
I’ve decided to collect together for your enjoyment and LOL’ing (still I shudder) an assortment of crazy, strange and yes, awesome quotes from my favorite Angst posts. I can and do amuse myself all the time (perhaps I’m the only one?). So…brace yourselves for genius (I’m so full of shit I can’t even let that…
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Something Stupid
You know what’s stupid? The fact that I have to drive to work every single day. It’s goddamned ridiculous that every day, I drive 45 minutes to work and 45 minutes home. EVERY DAY!! The same damn commute, wasting the same amount of…
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Failure the Musical!!!! STARRING MEEEE!!!
AKA: A Catalog of Woes: The Year in Review I know it’s not necessarily the time of year to be doing a year in review, but I have a need to see all my woes laid out in a humorous way for the…
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You Big Gorgeous Sexy Unfathomable Universe You!
The universe is dead sexy. Did you know? I’ve been obsessed with it lately and have been learning a lot about the latest discoveries and theories. So I’m going to walk you through the sexiness and vastness of space in this post. And…
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Friday Obsession-Thoughts: Gifs and Funny Blogs
YEAH It’s the FRIZZ!! How happy are you? The Frizz is the best day of the work week. And when it hits end-o’-work o’clock then it’s the best day/time of the weekend too! All in all, a sweet day. This week I’m obsessed with 2 things. Gifs and Funny blogs. For example, here’s one blog…
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Tandem Sleeping
When I write Tandem Sleeping it makes me laugh. It reminds me of slalom or something or for some reason bob sledding. Why? Why? Anyway, I want to write about sleeping with someone else. It’s weird. In particular I’m going to tell you about sleeping with Mr. VS. Doesn’t that sound like fun and/or inappropriate? …
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A New Addiction Cometh: Coffee
I’ve recently added a new addiction to my collection: coffee. (I do collect addictions even though I make claim to NOT having an addictive personality. FYI, the things that I claim are always strongly suspect.) Regarding Coffee, I never thought this addiction would happen to me. I thought I was immune to Coffee’s charms. But…
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I Am Full of Bullshit: My Best Quotes on Angst
I’ve decided to collect together for your enjoyment and LOL’ing (still I shudder) an assortment of crazy, strange and yes, awesome quotes from my favorite Angst posts. I can and do amuse myself all the time (perhaps I’m the only one?). So…brace yourselves for genius (I’m so full of shit I can’t even let that…
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Optimizing SEO for Maximum Angst
In learning recently about SEO, I’ve realized that I do a terrible job of catering to my old friend Google. Or Bing or Chrome or Jeeves or Yahoo or whomever rules my online searchability status (they treat me like a peasant, when clearly I’m deserving of royalty status. I am QUEEN!). Honestly, I don’t like…
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Uncanned Laughter: Post O’ the Day
I’m responding to a Post O’ the Day! Here’s the prompt: “A misused word, a misremembered song lyric, a cream pie that just happened to be there: tell us about a time you (or someone else) said or did something unintentionally funny. ” When I went camping a year ago with friends, we had the…
Angst Anarchy 