VS
Author Victoria Sawyer
Bring Me To Life
New novel coming soon!
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Sexy Canning = Botulism
Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…
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Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead
I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…
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My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland
So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half. Prior to this med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years. And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…
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Broken, The Internet Is
So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…
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A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling
Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies. It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead. I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that. What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically. Yes, yesterday I was…
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A Plea to Holiday Foods
Ummm…I slacked and didn’t post this before the holidays…so now you can enjoy it post-holidays. Plus the weight is still hanging on like a fat tick, so there’s that. Therefore this post still applies. The holidays are an evil time of year. There is food EVERYWHERE!!! SALT, FAT, SUGAR, SALT, FAT, SUGAR!!! Everywhere the eye…
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Are Bloggers Self-Centered Nitwits?
I read an article the other day that seemed to be crassly implying (okay, outright stating) that Bloggers are self-centered nitwits. That we write about ourselves because we’re obsessed with ourselves and that people who are not self absorbed wouldn’t be sitting there writing about themselves all the time. I gotta call bullshit on this. Because…
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A Mister Mister Holiday Tragedy
When I walked in the door the other day after work, Mr. VS was grooving around the kitchen while listening to Mister Mister and simultaneously baking chocolate chip cookies. He has a Mister Mister record on vinyl. It was blasting in all its 80’s glory. It was embarrassing. But then I noticed the huge bottles of Jameson…
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Raw Emotion – Publishing Angst
So, I’m really excited right now. I turned my novel over to my editor for the second time and I feel like I’m getting really close now. She thinks she’ll have it for 2 weeks at the most and then it’ll come back to me for final, final polishing edits and then, gulp, formatting for…
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This Season of USA is Lit!
These writers on this season of the USA are doing a bang up job keeping us on the edge of our seats! Let’s just hope they’re not like the writers for LOST! Buckle up for some existential rambling DREAD below! (Don’t worry, it’s…
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The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill
Remember that place the so-called Landfill? I know you’re like…”What? No? What place? I don’t recall anything like that.” (All said while avoiding eye contact). Well, I’m here to point your attention in the direction of your local landfill, filled not with LAND…
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This is Why We’re All Overweight
I’ve done a little thinking on the topic and I’ve come up with several reason why we’re all overweight and continue to gain the old lbs. The equation looks something like this: unhappiness + depression + meaninglessness + boredom + our modern culture…
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Your Viewing Pleasure – Guy on a Buffalo
Your Viewing Pleasure is where I share my favorite YouTube vids. This one is no exception. Apparently there’s this old movie about a guy riding on a buffalo and some genius decided to add a song track on top of the video. What emerges is classic. One day…the guy on the buffalo was riding around…
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Braggadocious! Introducing: The Blog Brag
Has it ever occurred to you how braggy songs can be? In particular hip hop songs are pretty damn braggy. It makes me laugh cause when you hear a braggy, pompous, I’m awesome, Eat my #@$% song you’re all pumped up and like…HELL YEA!!! PREACH!! You da Man! And you don’t mind the bragging at…
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Annoyance Analytics
The other day I was annoying Mr. VS as I typically do on a DAILY/HOURLY/MINUTE (ly ?) basis and it occurred to me that I need some kind of statistics to tell me if my annoyance campaigns are actually working. Like…am I properly annoying Mr. VS or are my tactics all wrong? It’s like how when…
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Teachers Getting Their Viral 15 Minutes
I don’t know about you but I am SO SICK to death of seeing those posts on Facebook, etc, from teachers who are trying to “teach” their class something about the power/dangers of social media. It’s so freaking annoying! Each one acts like they’re the first person to ever come up with the idea and…
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Your Viewing Pleasure – Leslie Hall- Body Rolls
Mr. VS makes fun of me for liking this, however even he had this song stuck in his head after I forced him to view it…. I’ve even been viewing this in the morning to start my day off right. For some reason I find this song to be motivating. It reminds me of Napoleon…
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A Slip and Fall on Snow and Ice
Sometimes I can be really graceful, much like a figure skater floating and gliding over the ice in a blowy sea green monstrosity. Can you imagine it now, as I ran to my car on a rainy night that was unfortunately hiding nasty tricksy invisible ice? It was a glory to be seen! The judges…
Angst Anarchy 