VS

Author Victoria Sawyer

Bring Me To Life

New novel coming soon!

  • Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…

  • Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…

  • My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half.  Prior to this  med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years.  And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…

  • Broken, The Internet Is

    Broken, The Internet Is

    So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…

  • A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling

    A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling

    Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies.  It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead.  I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that.  What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically.  Yes,  yesterday I was…

  • Big Game Hunter: Why?!

    Big Game Hunter: Why?!

    Now and then I see stories online about 2 things that catapult me trebuchet-style into a burning waste arc of madness. Two of them that have recently flung me into rage mode are are Big Game Hunters and the Ivory Trade. Why? WTF?!!!  Can someone explain to me how both of these things are still…

  • Alice in Wonderland

    Alice in Wonderland

    I’ve inadvertently been learning a hella lot about Alice in Wonderland recently and I thought you’d like to hear about my newfound expertise! First off, I listened to this book on tape (ahaha…CD):  Alice, I Have Been by Melanie Benjamin.  A fascinating read about the real Alice in Wonderland, Alice Liddell. Apparently Alice was a…

  • Vampires be Chillin’ at My House

    Vampires be Chillin’ at My House

    This week it’s LADIES NIGHT!! Be sure to visit the other FBF bloggers (their links are at the bottom of the post)! At my house, we’ve got a serious domestic vampire problem. It’s getting really bad because the cats are hanging out with them in the yard, chillaxin’ in the long grass, hanging out under…

  • Avoidance Methods that Really Work – Guaranteed!

    I visited the old Writer’s Digest today to look at writing prompts because I’m stagnant like a mosquito-breeding mossy woodland pool.  I’m breeding mosquitoes that’s how motionless I am at the moment.  I might even be breeding ticks!!  GROSS.  As a nasty aside, I like call them body spiders, personally.  I’ll say to my husband,…

  • How “I” Knocked My Own Socks Off

    I’m so helpful lately! You guys should be PAYING me for all this free advice! No?! You think I should pay you for forcing your eyes to bleed and your head to reel like a drunken idiot? Fine. FINE!! Someone slap me, I’m getting a bit full of it… This post is supposed to be…

  • Angst (Review)

    Amazing review of Angst (seriously what a well written review!) by fellow author S.A. Williams.  Thank you! Angst (Review). via Angst (Review).

  • A Critique – Identity Crisis or Journey of Self-Discovery?

    “Sometimes I get so tired of being critiqued in everything I do.  Art and writing. It gets so hard to still actually want to create something.  But I guess that comes with the territory, your creativity will always be judged, labeled and critiqued.  It’s hard because creativity is close to my heart and getting criticized…

  • A Crazy Sexy Cool Snapshot of Me

    A Crazy Sexy Cool Snapshot of Me

    Let’s be honest with each other right now.  This is sort of a secret blog.  People in my “real” life don’t know about it.  I’m trying however to come out of the writing closet and I recently told one of my cousins about what I’m doing.  Sort of.  I was vague as all hell, but…

  • Heat Drips, Like Fire Across the Skin

    Heat Drips, Like Fire Across the Skin

    I plucked the words, fresh and clean To taste, with the tip of my tongue Fresh fruit, a strawberry A slice of citrus, orange strong Texture smooth, thick cream Sensual Lip to warm soft lip I kiss them into him Saccharine turns to ash Chalky, dry A parched desert Of powdered milk I taste, Charcoal…

  • Black Friday Crusades

    Black Friday Crusades

    Hello All on this lovely Black Friday!  I’m here to tell you why Black Friday is the WORST invention EVER!!  I feel a little rant coming on. I think it’s pretty funny that we’ve got this holiday where we’re supposed to be loving…

  • Nature’s Fail:  Exercise

    Nature’s Fail: Exercise

    I’m really intent on blaming someone (even if it’s not actually a person) for my problems. My latest conjecture is that it’s nature’s fault that I don’t exercise and I’m going to prove to you (as if I’m writing a geometry proof) that…

  • Complain-a-thon: Traffic

    Complain-a-thon: Traffic

    I don’t know why, but when I’m driving is when I seem to find things annoying and ridiculous and stupid.  In particular, driving makes me hate humanity.  That’s normal, right? Here’s a list of things that I think are stupid (mostly because it…

  • My Endometriosis Story

    My Endometriosis Story

    Having a chronic illness is cool. Having several is even better. It’s especially fun when you think one of them might be gone and then it REARS its ugly head yet again and brings you right back to square one, living Groundhog Day all over again. So let’s talk about my Endometriosis story, which I…

  • This Season of USA is Lit!

    This Season of USA is Lit!

    These writers on this season of the USA are doing a bang up job keeping us on the edge of our seats! Let’s just hope they’re not like the writers for LOST! Buckle up for some existential rambling DREAD below! (Don’t worry, it’s not political.) As an aside – I randomly decided to check out…

  • As the Earth Tilts…on its Evil Axis

    As the Earth Tilts…on its Evil Axis

    It’s that time of year again when the earth tries to screw those of us in the northern hemisphere by tilting itself away from the beautiful rays of the benevolent sun. Yes, ladies and gentleman, the hours of day light are getting shorter and we’re getting a hell of a lot colder, fast. Damn you…

  • The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill

    The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill

    Remember that place the so-called Landfill? I know you’re like…”What? No? What place? I don’t recall anything like that.” (All said while avoiding eye contact). Well, I’m here to point your attention in the direction of your local landfill, filled not with LAND but with plastic and unwanted junk. Remember that place? I know, I…

  • Skinny Jeans: Finally, a Reasonable Explanation

    Skinny Jeans: Finally, a Reasonable Explanation

    For the longest time it’s been very unclear to my why Skinny Jeans are a thing. In fact, I devoted an entire blog post to my musing on the fact that Skinny Jeans do justice to no one and thus are a vast criminal empire where justice doesn’t even exist. But finally, the day has…

  • Tears of a Kitten: A Heroic Cat Rescue

    Tears of a Kitten: A Heroic Cat Rescue

    Here’s a story for all you cat mothers out there. A story of heroism, kitten crocodile tears, trees, ticks, poison ivy, sneaky cats, darkness and more!! All the elements of a truly epic tale. SO EXCITING!! Several months ago in the early spring, I got home from work late just a little before 8 PM…

  • Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…

  • Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…

  • My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half.  Prior to this  med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years.  And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…

“Sometimes the darkness makes the light seem brighter.”

Victoria Sawyer

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