VS

Author Victoria Sawyer

Bring Me To Life

New novel coming soon!

  • Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…

  • Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…

  • My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half.  Prior to this  med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years.  And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…

  • Broken, The Internet Is

    Broken, The Internet Is

    So there are some people out there that think they are going to break the internet with their ass. These ‘people’ shall remain nameless since I can’t stand to toot their horn more than it has already been tooted by everyone else on the planet. However, I do have a few things to say on…

  • A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling

    A Case of “the Uglies” with Mincing and Ogling

    Yesterday I had a mean case of the uglies.  It’s sort of like the “mondays” but it’s the uglies instead.  I don’t mean, I was ugly, as in I was horrible to be around or my mood was hideous or anything like that.  What I mean is that I felt…hideous, physically.  Yes,  yesterday I was…

  • #You Look Disgusting

    #You Look Disgusting

    I love it when I get fired up whilst reading the internets. It happens ALL THE TIME and it’s usually pretty good fodder for the blog.  This is no exception. There’s a movement out there (on twitter as #youlookdisgusting, hence the # or heavy sign) called You Look Disgusting. It’s about blogger Em Ford who…

  • My Old School Time Capsule

    My Old School Time Capsule

    What’s crackalackin airheads? I recently received an email from the cool peeps over at Man Crates, self titled as the “most awesome gift in the world,” which it just might be, as I think Mr. VS would very much enjoy using a crow bar to force entry into his own manly gift. It sounds right up his alley!…

  • My Own Rebuttal: Therapy & Social Anxiety

    My Own Rebuttal: Therapy & Social Anxiety

    As I said in my last post, I’m not sure if I can overcome my anxiety with therapy.  I say this but at the same time, I do believe that if I had enough patience, dedication and time, I probably could come to terms with it better than I do now.  Yes, my fears are…

  • Like Me, Oh Please Like Me!

    Ok we’re getting a little desperate around these parts lately in the “tone” of our posts.  Note to self, stop being disgusting!  haha. I kid!  I want you guys to like my new Facebook page!  I need 30 likes before I can pick my own url etc, so get over there and help a sister…

  • Winner! And My V-Day Poem Explained!

    So, amazingly, somehow, don’t ask me how, the winner of my raffle is Jocelyn Dex!  I swear to you guys on everything I hold dear that I didn’t rig this thing!  I just hit the button for Rafflecopter to let me know who the winner was and her name literally popped up.  So, congrats Jocelyn! …

  • It’s a Cruel Cruel WordPress World!

    I’ve been blogging for about 2 1/2 months now, not saying much I know, however I still haven’t really figured out how this works.  I feel like sometimes I put something out there and I get a great response, other times I can hear crickets chirping it’s so quiet.  There doesn’t seem to be a…

  • Imagine a Sexy Raging Frat Party

    Imagine a Sexy Raging Frat Party

    Sexy, scandalous and…crazy.  Let me take you on a journey in your imagination: Imagine a raging Halloween party at a dirty frat. Imagine a small college party at an apartment just off campus, smoke billowing through the air from a glass pipe as you inhale and exhale, coughing, suddenly lightheaded and…free.  Imagine playing asshole with…

  • From the Business End of a Loaded Handgun

    From the Business End of a Loaded Handgun

    Hello All, in honor of my book being available for purchase today on Amazon, here, I wanted to share this serious post about Suicide as this is one of the themes that is dealt with in my novel.  Now whatever you do, do not look up suicide on google images like I just did, there…

  • I’m Just a Day Away!

    Hi all, just a quick update.  I’m really excited because I’m very close to publishing my novel.  I’m doing a final reading now to catch any last formatting, grammatical or other errors and then I’m uploading my novel!  I can’t believe I’ve come this far.  Stay tuned and I’ll let you know when it’s finally…

  • This Season of USA is Lit!

    This Season of USA is Lit!

    These writers on this season of the USA are doing a bang up job keeping us on the edge of our seats! Let’s just hope they’re not like the writers for LOST! Buckle up for some existential rambling DREAD below! (Don’t worry, it’s…

  • The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill

    The Happy Forgotten Place Where Plastic Lives: The Landfill

    Remember that place the so-called Landfill? I know you’re like…”What? No? What place? I don’t recall anything like that.” (All said while avoiding eye contact). Well, I’m here to point your attention in the direction of your local landfill, filled not with LAND…

  • This is Why We’re All Overweight

    This is Why We’re All Overweight

    I’ve done a little thinking on the topic and I’ve come up with several reason why we’re all overweight and continue to gain the old lbs. The equation looks something like this: unhappiness + depression + meaninglessness + boredom + our modern culture…

  • Complain-a-thon: Traffic

    Complain-a-thon: Traffic

    I don’t know why, but when I’m driving is when I seem to find things annoying and ridiculous and stupid.  In particular, driving makes me hate humanity.  That’s normal, right? Here’s a list of things that I think are stupid (mostly because it makes me have anxiety about my MPG.  Seriously I have anxiety/irritation about…

  • A Wooden Anniversary with Hiking

    A Wooden Anniversary with Hiking

    Mr. VS and I just celebrated our “Wooden” Anniversary.  For those not in the know, a wooden anniversary is 5 years and Mr. VS and I are enjoying wooden wedded bliss  Thus we celebrate.  It’s lame because once you get up there in years for anniversaries you get to have silver or gold anniversaries, a…

  • Submitting to the Sickness

    Per usual I have obtained through no fault of my own (I swear) my typical September Cold.  YEEEHAWWW.  So very thrilling I can’t even contain myself as I wave my tissue pom-poms in the air with a barely mustered excitement. I don’t know what it is, but as soon as September rolls around I always…

  • Getting Social with the Locals

    Getting Social with the Locals

    Have you ever attempted to get social, face to face? Like actual FACE TIME in the REAL WORLD? And no, I don’t mean the program Face Time online. I mean like REAL in person, social media. Or just social, without the media.  Like Media-free socializing.  Saying it that way sounds so naughty!  NO protection at…

  • Friday Mad Libs

    Friday Mad Libs

    From now on, or whenever the hell I remember, I’m going to present you with some Mad Libs.  Remember Mad Libs?  That shit was great.  I remember being in my bedroom on the corded phone with my best friend (it was the 90’s! yea!!), filling out Mad Libs and laughing uproariously.  Of course we’d make…

  • Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Sexy Canning = Botulism

    Mr. VS and I were quite domesticated (like badly behaved pets) this fall and we tried some canning from the bounty of the land, i.e. our garden. BTW…we totally have a farm or something minus any animals except cats – cat farm? Our farm has no name currently but it could be called Poison Ivy…

  • Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    Forget the Lifetime Failure Tally: Look Ahead

    I’ve now officially (you heard it here) been informed, through an article online that I cannot find again (did it really exist??) that I should be looking toward the future and not at the past. Mr. VS also recently told me that millionaires and highly successful people refuse to see failure and instead are always…

  • My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    My Body is a Polluted Bombed Out Wasteland

    So as you might know, I’ve been on meds (Zoloft for anxiety/panic attacks) for about a year and a half.  Prior to this  med-circus I’m partaking in now, I had been off meds for 3.5 years.  And before that I was on them for about 8 years and prior to that I was medication free…

“Sometimes the darkness makes the light seem brighter.”

Victoria Sawyer

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